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Kidderminster Hat

Posted: Mon Nov 24, 2008 7:38 pm
by Pe├▒a Oxford United
Harried 1 (o.g.) Harriers 1 (o.g.)

3333 222

Nick Merry is in the boardroom, plotting revenge on Ian Lenagan for depsoing him as Chairman. Just as he leaves, Keith Cox turns up with Ghislane Maxwell, who has hired Cox as her lawyer. Merry once borrowed money from Ghislane, the terms of the loan being that he promised to marry her if the money was not repaid - and as it is still outstanding, she wishes to hold his to that promise. Cox, still bitter at being frozen out of the football club in an earlier deal, promises to assist her in her search for vengeance.

Posted: Mon Nov 24, 2008 8:39 pm
by Radley Rambler
Us 1 Them 1

Constable, Richards

Att: 3500 with 150 away

Posted: Mon Nov 24, 2008 10:56 pm
by Snake
Us 1 (Yemi) Them 1 (Barnes-Homer)

Att: 3999 with 123 of Them

UE: What? An unusual and unpredictable event at our football club? Nah, same old, same old prevails..

Posted: Mon Nov 24, 2008 11:37 pm
by Baboo
0-2
Richards 2
3888
ue - we come away from the ground confident we'll make the play-offs

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 6:32 am
by newhinkseyyellow
Oxford 3 (Constable 2, Trainer) Kidderminster 1 (Richards)


3897 (154 - Kidderminster)

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 7:14 am
by Yellow River
Oxford 2 Kidderminster 1

Yemi, Deering. Brittain.

4380 (280)

UE Patto does a Fergie and refuses to do a post match interview with the BBC sending his No.2 Mickey Lewis who proceeds to perform an improptu version of 'Mad dogs and Englishmen' live on Radio Oxford.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 8:13 am
by A-Ro
0 - 1 Brittain 4000 100

UE David Kemp is seen in the SSU.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 10:59 am
by Hog
Losers 1 Them 2
Constable, Richards 2
3888
222
UE: Kick off delayed at the last moment when the referee decides she needs to try on a couple of different tops and then has to phone her best mate Sally for advice about whether to wear her hair up or down. The second half is also delayed when the ref insists on washing (and drying) all the tea cups, irons the assistants flags and then makes the players tidy their changing rooms before being allowed out to play. And the Oxford crowd spend the whole game singing We love you Amy, we do!

I know, I know!

Re:

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 11:15 am
by amershamwrighty
&quotHog&quot wrote:Losers 1 Them 2
Constable, Richards 2
3888
222
UE: Kick off delayed at the last moment when the referee decides she needs to try on a couple of different tops and then has to phone her best mate Sally for advice about whether to wear her hair up or down. The second half is also delayed when the ref insists on washing (and drying) all the tea cups, irons the assistants flags and then makes the players tidy their changing rooms before being allowed out to play. And the Oxford crowd spend the whole game singing We love you Amy, we do!

I know, I know!
If I may say so, after a largely cheerless week, that made me laugh !

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 11:29 am
by theox
Oxford 1-3 Kidderminster
Constable - Barnes-Homer 2, Brittain
3,896 (297)

UE - not once is the chant 'you should have stayed in the kitchen' heard.


edited for scorer. thought i should take this game seriously for once!!!

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 12:38 pm
by boris
Adults 4 Kidds 5
Guy, Chap, Bloke, Matey boy John Barnes Homer Simpson Wallis
4444 (222)

UE 1: The whole crowd sings &quotPatto's Yellow Army&quot for the full 90 minutes plus Abbey Press time, and at the end of the game they chair him from the field and demonstrate outside the boardroom, demanding that Patto be offered a lifetime contract.
UE 2: Haldane puts in a tackle.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 12:46 pm
by oxfordjames
Useless tossers 1 Kids 2
Dont care, Richards, Barnes-Homer
3946 (101)
UE: The bitch has a fair game.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 12:59 pm
by Ancient Colin
Old Cows 1 Young Goats 2
Day, Barnes-Homer, Moore
3,789, 222

Kelvin announces a package of measures to halt the decline, including increasing the levels of debt progressively over the next four years, cutting the price of programmes and replica shirts by 2%, delaying ticket price increases and so forth, to be part paid by a new tax of 45% on Hutchinson's salary. The referee's name actually revealed to be Prudence. A virus strikes down 90% of Oxford fans and the remaining 10% struggle to come to terms with existing in a new, strange world with none of the facilities and certainties of the past. Civilisation ends and Frank posts a hat table.

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 1:04 pm
by Shoobedoo
Shudder 0 - 1 Kidder
Barnes-Homer

3,436
96

UE: Game stopped every 20 mins so ref can go to the loo.

(Edited for scorer as Richards is out).

Posted: Tue Nov 25, 2008 2:00 pm
by Mooro
Oxford 2 Kidderminster 0 (Guy, Constable)
Att 4012 Away 211

UE - one side attempts to make a 4th substitution
UE2 - a player gets sent off for dissent to the ref.
UE3 - transpires that referee is related to the Crawley assistant boss and f's and blinds so much in the opening ten minutes that all players cower if they go anywhere near her.