Oxford win 1-0 (Clarke)
Att 4399 Away 212
UE - Power cuts out in 89th minute, but referee blows whistle to end game anyway, rather than have to go through the whole experience again.
Us 1 (Constable) Then 2 (Pearson, Harad)
Attn 4545 with 300 from there.
U.E. That moron who stands behind me doesnt spend the whole match singing songs to the wrong tune or shouting 'W*anker, W*nker, W*nker, W*nker...........
UE: All the Burton players turned up hammered after an excursion to the brewery. The Ox boys are so shocked by this, that they walk off and the BSP declares it a 2-1 victory. All media outlets conjure up a fictitious report, but we're not supposed to know that....
UE- Whilst Mr James Constable celebrates an injury time winner by hopping towards the corner flag on one leg, he can clearly be heard to say in a rather loud theatrical voice "Why came I hither but to that intent?
Think you a little din can daunt mine ears? Have I not in my time heard Lions roar? Have I not heard the sea, puffed up with winds, Rage like an angry boar, chafèd with sweat? Have I not heard great ordnance in the field And heaven's arrtilery thunder in the skies? Have I not in pitchèd battle heard. Loud 'larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets clang? And do you tell me of a woman's tongue, That gives not half so great a blow to hear As will a chesnut in a farmer's fire?"
Oxford XI 11 Burton XI 11
Constable 6 Guy 5, Morris 11
44444 (1)
UE: Game postponed because of fire.
Game postponed because of floodlight failure.
Game postponed because of molehills in the centre circle.
Game postponed because of the huge numbers of fans trying to get in.
Game postponed because of the dying rays of the setting sun glinting like steel in the sherds of our hearts, making light music in the swellings of our corpuscles, drying the tears of the burning shadows, dreaming, dreaming, dreaming...